Things have been shifting in my mind a bit lately. For the best. This might sound pretty strange, but I feel as though I'm shedding off a heavy blanket that has been weighing me down and making it hard to see ahead. It's also made me feel little and mean and unable to really appreciate life. I've also felt suspicious of good things in my life. Almost as though I needed to root out why they happened to me. Why did I deserve something that good? I've spent quite a bit of time tearing down all that I've been trying to build. What a waste! And yet, I think, for some reason, I needed to go through that.

I lost something wonderful. Perhaps for the rest of this lifetime. Something I know I deserved and still deserve. But I will keep on going with the goals and challenges I've set in place for myself. Why? Because I deserve to be strong and healthy. And I will accept nothing less from myself.

To the two lovely women cheering me on in this crazy PFT - I love you both and feel so very lucky to have you there, even though you're in different states. I'm really looking forward to the Summer Solstice because I know you will both be there in Spirit.